| | Today is my birthday. Well, it's not actually my birthday. It is the birthday of one of my minions. Fortunately for me, once you become a minion of mine, I obtain all rights to your birthday. All well wishes, cards, songs and presents become the property of one Mac the Great & Mighty Sloth. I suppose I shouldn't say I take the entire birthday. You retain the privilege of continued aging and all of the foreseeable problems and unpleasantness that goes with it while I receive the joy of celebrations and... cake. Yes, I do enjoy a slice of birthday cake now and again with a nice Jones Soda, circa May 2006. Certainly, you don't expect me to drink aged Jones Soda?! Wretched minion! And surprise parties are acceptable so long as I have total access and dominion over the planning process. In turn, I agree to feign shock, surprise and utter delight (provided that all of my demands have been met). I will provide my list of demands -- er, gift requests -- to each guest. Should a guest arrive at the party without said gift, I cannot be responsible for the furious dancing that will result. Mind you, a party is not a party without furious dancing. I am famous for my furious dancing as you are no doubt aware. You have seen my movies -- "Footloose and Furious Dancing," "Dirty Furious Dancing" (which entails me furiously dancing in the mud); "Flash Furious Dancing," "Shall We Furiously Dance?" and, of course, "Save the Last Furious Dance." If you have not seen any of these movies, they are available for purchase. Should you choose not to purchase any of these masterpieces of cinematic genius, I shall perform all of them live -- on your head. Happy Birthday to me! |
| | Posted 5/2/2006 2:25 PM - 117 Views - 4 eProps - 2 comments
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